Princesses in Distress?

Creating a Society Full of Princesses in Distress
By Christine Brody

Since the moment of finding out I was pregnant, I was certain I was having a boy—I even called him Jack for the first five months of life in the womb. I pictured blue Osh Kosh overalls, dump trucks, and pinstripe Yankee uniforms with Johnny Damon’s number on the back. His first Halloween costume would be a firefighter’s just like his Daddy and I even thought of stocking up on the “pee pee tee pees” for the impending showers during diaper changes. So when I found out this month that I was having a little girl who I now apologetically call Riley, I was shocked and delighted by how off my maternal instinct actually was. I also wondered if I’d be any good at raising a girl. Why would God give me a girl if I spent most of my childhood digging for worms, playing catch with my brothers, and avoiding anything that remotely resembled dolls, stockings, and pattened leather shoes?

Regardless, being the Aunt of four nieces you will find me painting finger nails, having tea parties, fixing pony tails and all that good stuff but I can’t help but wonder about the “princess” phenomena. Princesses are royalty. They are rich and beautiful and can be found in fairytales, Monaco, and the UK. They are in every store and every closet, on sippy cups, socks, bathing suits, and toothbrushes. But what kind of message are they sending to the world? When we play dress up with our little girls and put them in princess dresses, tiaras, and other shiny bling are we telling them that happiness comes from money and beauty? I want Riley to look up to people who are generous, intelligent, independent, and creative—not simply externally beautiful.

Are we creating a society full of disillusioned, disappointed, young women? As a high school teacher I am horrified by how many senior girls wearing “Princess” baby tees plan on majoring in marrying rich. I want Riley to feel the sense of accomplishment from earning a degree, landing a job, and the rush from obtaining her first paycheck and business card.

Are we sending girls out into the world in search of fantasy, in search of the unattainable non-existent Prince? I can’t tell you how many weddings I see where the bride-to-be twirls around in her wedding dress claiming that she is a princess. Well, she’s not! She lives in realty where there is stress, bills, the IRS, and bird flu. Mirror mirror on the wall, why won’t the divorce rate ever fall? Now, at three years old my nieces don’t need to know all this but can’t we prepare them for a reality that depends on partnership as opposed to a Prince? I don’t want Riley thinking that she needs a Prince to make her happy.